or


[10/28/04 - 12:00 AM]
Homer Simpson for President!

[via press release from FOX]

HOMER SIMPSON FOR PRESIDENT!

Homer Simpson in 2004! Everyman Homer Simpson would be the ideal candidate for President of the United States, it was reported today by local Springfield news anchor Kent Brockman. Simpson detailed his would-be platform after downing several cans of Duff beer at his favorite watering hole, Moe's Tavern. Simpson has yet to name his running mate, but it is rumored to be either Barney, Moe, Lenny or Carl. It is unlikely Homer would choose Krusty the Clown, given Krusty's failed bid for the presidency in 1992. Vowing to make a change, Simpson revealed the following campaign platform:

HOMER SIMPSON'S CAMPAIGN PLATFORM

A friend to one, a friend to all. (Except Flanders.)

There is nothing to fear except fear itself. Oh... and fear of the voices... the constant voices telling me to do things... bad things.

I promise there will be fewer nuclear disasters with me as your President than with me as your nuclear safety inspector.

I will fill the pot holes, help the pot heads and eat the pot pies.

I will put a man on Mars within the decade. That man will be Flanders. And he will not return.

No big government, just big waist sizes.

Children are the future. That's why they must be stopped today.

I will make the trains run on time. On second thought, coal might be better. I will make the trains run on coal.

I will legalize the hunting of sisters-in-law.

Repeal all taxes... make Sweden pay for everything.

Homer and the rest of THE SIMPSONS are back for an epic 16th season beginning with all-new episodes Sunday, Nov. 7 (8:00-8:30 PM ET/PT) on FOX.

THE SIMPSONS is a Gracie Films Production in association with 20th Century Fox Television. James L. Brooks, Matt Groening and Al Jean are the executive producers. Film Roman is the animation house.





  [october 2004]  
S
M
T
W
T
F
S
     


· SIMPSONS, THE (FOX)









[08/04/15 - 12:07 PM]
Disney's "Descendants" Powers Disney Channel to Primetime Sweep and Over 1-Year Highs
Disney Channel spins the numbers for the week of July 27-August 2.

[08/04/15 - 12:02 PM]
Casting News: "DC's Legends of Tomorrow" Gets Savage
Danish actor Casper Crump has been cast as the immortal Vandal Savage.

[08/04/15 - 11:26 AM]
Animal Planet Runs 12-Hour Marathon of Lion Programming, Dedicated to Cecil the Lion, On August 10 -- World Lion Day
Animal Planet's roaring about World Lion Day to honor the majestic lion - one of the most revered species on the planet - whose numbers are in decline.

[08/04/15 - 11:20 AM]
ABC Announces Kristen Bell Will Host "It's Your 50th Christmas, Charlie Brown" Special, Airing November 30
The anniversary special will celebrate 50 years of the iconic classic that has brought joy and a television watching tradition at the holidays for generations of fans.

[08/04/15 - 11:07 AM]
"48 Hours: Fall from Grace" Is Saturday's #1 Program with Adults 25-54 and Viewers
CBS spins the numbers for Saturday, August 1.

[08/04/15 - 10:37 AM]
Showtime(R) Sets World Television Premiere Date for "Prophet's Prey"
The film, due on Saturday, October 10, focuses on the tyrannical cult leader Warren Jeffs.

[08/04/15 - 10:37 AM]
FOX Sports Telecasts Premier Boxing Champions Under Multi-Year Media Rights Deal
FOX Sports 1 premieres "Toe-to-Toe Tuesdays," a new, live primetime boxing series on Tuesday, Sept. 8 (9:00 PM ET), which continues for a total of 21 shows through the end of June.

[08/04/15 - 10:32 AM]
The Jackson Family Legacy Lives on in New Series, "The Jacksons: Next Generation," Premiering October 2nd on Lifetime
The series focuses on the third generation of the famed Jackson family - Taj, Taryll and TJ - Tito Jackson's sons and nephews of the famed Jackson 5.

[08/04/15 - 10:11 AM]
Video: El Rey Network and Miramax(R) Release Robert Rodriguez Featurette from Season Two of the Supernatural Crime Saga "From Dusk Till Dawn: The Series"
Rodriguez gives viewers an exclusive glimpse at the new season.

[08/04/15 - 10:04 AM]
"Drunk History" Season 3 Premieres Tuesday, September 1 at 10:30 p.m. on Comedy Central
Tony Hale, Greg Kinnear, Justin Long, Christopher Meloni, Stephen Merchant and Jason Ritter guest star in the season opener.

[08/04/15 - 09:32 AM]
ABC Family Starts Production on Drama Pilot "Stay" and Announces Full Cast
Skeet Ulrich will portray Shane Brenner, a recently widowed father who has mysteriously packed up his daughters to move them across country, but is stranded by a storm at a mysterious old hotel.

[08/04/15 - 09:03 AM]
American Pharoah's Victory in Haskell Invitational on NBC Is Most-Watched Summer Race in 13 Years
NBC spins the numbers for Sunday, August 2.

[08/04/15 - 08:51 AM]
NBC Sweeps Monday in All Key Measures Among the Big 4, Wins 6 of 6 Half-Hours in Adults 18-49
NBC spins the numbers for Monday, August 3.

[08/04/15 - 08:35 AM]
ABC's "Bachelor in Paradise" Monday Debut Surges by Double Digits From Its Sunday Premiere in Total Viewers and Adults 18-49
ABC spins the numbers for Monday, August 3.

[08/04/15 - 08:20 AM]
Monday's Broadcast Ratings: NBC Tops Charts with "American Ninja Warrior"
The Peacock nearly doubles its closest competitor among adults 18-49.